I am good. I dancing. Drinking but dancing fine.
ugly people sure do ruin things
you got so mad from losing a game of beerpong that you went into another room by yourself and practiced for an hour and a half.
This threesome is so guaranteed that dinner feels like a charade
so this guy comes in from the patio covered in puke and says "we gotta go"...Yup u need to go is an understatement
She just took the bottle of jager to the bathroom and locked the door. Now I hear the water running..if the house floods she's paying for it
She just kept introducing me to people by telling them which of their friends I've fucked
I had to convince someone last night that the fact that he couldn't get me off wasn't him it was me and to clarify I had to tell him there was only. One person that got me off every time without fail, he said "that guy is my hero" you should be proud
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I'm a terrible friend...i should have come right over instead of having sex for an hour and a half. :/ want anything from burger king?
I'm sitting on my couch eating a bag of marshmallows and watching someone run bare ass down the street. What has happened to my life?
I puked on his mom. Not my proudest moment
Cocaine and dance dance revolution for 4 hours. I consider last night a success.
It's like the cookie assaulted me with being high.
I'm covered in glow paint and shame. I'm never leaving this country
Randomize
