Ha. No worries! So loud here &god I love drag queens! How does it happen, the congealing?
I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
theres a boy scout troop on my plane. right now theyre playing wilderness games. let me just tell you how excited i am to hit on all of them
a queef is a wish your heart makes.
I farted on Jack's balls last night. He got pissed and walked away cause he knew it was on purpose. I couldn't hold it in anymore.
I don't remember coming home but there is cereal EVERYWHERE
She never called back. Financed a fleshlight.
I know I hit you with my car but people express love in different ways. Everyone is different.
I was just given a safe word. It's going it be an interesting night.
Can't we have real sex instead of you just thrusting the air near me?
I can't blame him for thinking that then, placing a cone shaped potato chip on the tip of his penis post bj is not a normal act of love
I'm gonna keep a minimum of five drink promise to myself
You mean maximum 5?
I think clothing becomes optional at the second date! But you seem like a rule breaker
thought i saw a dude in a kilt yesterday, but then i realized he was doing a walk of shame. happy st. paddy's day.
I just watched two birds fight or fuck. It was crazy. Another bird was watching closer and I know that bird understood what was happening better than me.
Randomize
