This is how I know I have no life... Jon and Kate are my emotional roller coaster.
whatever. i fb stalked him and his pic comments are witty. so i'm going for it.
Thanks for talking me down from peeing on his window last night.
I am now curious as to how you would have aimed.
I told him "thank you for wearing a turtleneck yesterday, I no longer have a strong erg to have sex with you. " He is no longer speaking to me.
he tried to breastfeed my turtle
I'm by the dj to the left. Come get me now this girl is talking about baby names and I dnt even no hers
I can't see you
I'm the only one that's wearing a tarzan outfit get your ass over here you douche
New drinking game. Every time Romney and Santorum switch leads, take a shot.
....this is what your political science major is getting you?
Yes he was puking but in the only light of the whole parking lot and he was resting in the patch of clovers and he just was a garden fairy
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
The night before doing drugs with your bro is like Christmas Eve that made love to thanksgiving that made love a virgin.
I'm too socially awkward and sexually frustrated to get through this evening sober.
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
He has a bear rug in his room. I'm going to ask if we can have sex on it. Wilderness sex.
Why is there a mildly painful bruise on my back?
You slipped off the sink last night.
Why was I on the sink......?
;)
That portable toilet under the bed? Turns out it was a tuba. Explains alot.
Randomize
