Would you rather have a 10 inch but pencil thin penis or a 2 inch very fat one?
Fat, it's not about touching the bottom it's about raising hell of the sides.
Its already bleeding so dont be alarmed after you bite it
That is correct. I did in fact somehow pass out in the tanning booth for over an hour. And yes the attendant did have to open it up and shake me awake.
YOU RECOMMENDED ME TO THIS GIRL BECAUSE SHES A STRIPPER AND YOU KNOW MY WEAKNESS FOR STRIPPERS WITH CHILDREN.
the wall and i were having dominance issues.
Just say you're the husband at the front desk to get in. She's in room 15 at the ER.
what? who is this?
he threw up in a solo cup, then washed it out and used it to play flip cup. Im not sure if thats resourceful or disgusting.
you peed off the balcony at your sisters and asked someone below to catch it with a cup
I didn't know where we were going to start fucking, so I just strategically hid condoms all over the house before he came over.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
There is not enough whiskey in the world to get me through what happened on Pretty Little Liars tonight.
First world problems.
You helped blow my nose... Ok it's safe to say we are on a new level of relationship..
I was a little curious what "unspeakable" things he could possibly do to my feet
I just want to eat my penis shaped food in front of you and see how you feel about it.
after last night, ive never not wanted to live so much in my life.
Randomize
