I think the neighbors upstairs are trying for more kids. I want to run up there and yell "mazal tov!"
M WATCHING THE HISTORY CHANNEL AND IT SAID THAT WHEN THE LUST PART OF THE BRAIN IS ACTIVATED THE JUDGEMENT PART IS NOT. THIS EXPLAINS SO MUCH.
i think i have that disease where you wake up in strange places drunk.
No mixer. Vodka in yogurt?
Do you know what's great about Canada?..... There will always be a Tim Hortons on my walk of shame route
The best way to start drinking is as early as possible. eg, this bar isn't open but we're patiently waiting outside. That way you're confident and exciting when the talent arrives. Or too drunk to care.
she broke my one feeling. seriously I think she broke my dick.
I woke up on a navy base in a different time zone. I'm never leaving tallahassee again.
He's so twisted that he's acting out Dragon Ball-Z by himself. The Tanquray and THC combo doesn't play around.
It was awful. He had a wife
And now you've had a year of virgin penance. Absolve yourself.
Well his dad is my dentist so they've both been in my mouth.
At this point, I wouldn't be surprised if he laughs at all of our attempts to keep him sober.
I understand why animals eat their young in the wild after watching your kid this afternoon
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
I basically go to him for great dick and great memes.
Randomize
