Listen: if you or anyone else at work finds a starfish in a bowl, just leave it. It'll be gone by next week.
Better yet, if you find it can you put it in the mini-fridge in your office for safe keeping? Spanks.
And if it's going to get me in trouble, maybe just don't mention that I know anything about it.
Alex, there's no such thing as a fancy sex store.
im having a threesome with these popsicles
i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i scrubbed and i still was a whore
The professor just announced to the class that I talked to him in the bar on my birthday.
she tossed me in the back of the car and said "god gave u the gift of life and I wanna swallow it"
we found you in the closet, clutching coats that werent yours for stability
Agreed. And i highly doubt it could be awkward. You do remember our introduction was a direct result of you mentioning your affinity for my genitals, right?
during a bj, his alarm went off and he said "At the buzzer"
You got a blow job by a girl whose nickname is "the terrible tooth"?! You are a brave man.
Hit a new low. I'm FB stalking him while he is lying in bed sleeping naked next to me. He fell asleep with FB still open and unlocked on his iPad.
I will rip it off your body in ways are socially offensive but you still kind of like.
You were a hurricane of blowjobs and glitter makeup. You came out of the closet and took the house down with it
I'm not allowed back because I may or may not have insulted his beer. And the entire Czech Republic.
Only great wives bring your dope to you when you are at the Cardiologist
Randomize
