the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
I am paying my roommate as much of the electric bill in pennies as possible because I hate her.
He is going to sleep with me. That's all there is to it. I'm 4 for 4 right now. I'm not making it 4 for 5.
More likely there's a very shell-shocked cat wandering around somewhere, covered in potato peelings
She poured a bottle of rum in the champagne fountain, did like 5 jello shots at the same time, then lit herself on fire. Twice. This is how everyone should turn 21.
no more heavy drinking durning the lady that cleans the office told me i have to emtpy my own thrash if i puke in it
Life lesson: When you compete in an impromptu "bloody mary chug-off," in the end, no one wins.
Dear slutty diary: I lied about feeling guilty of being a homewrecker in order to have more sex. it worked.
You know what's even more awkward then buying plan b from someone who is a member at the gym you work at... When they come in after that day and have that look of recognition
She told me she ate a whole pizza today, and I just wanted to hug her forever.
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I wouldn't hate if he could handle a sex only type of ship. I really don't want to use the word "relation" in front of that.
In hindsight, I probably should not have let the waiter give me a chiropractic adjustment on my neck last night.
Sharknado 3 is going to bring us to alcoghol poisonign
Speaking of dumpster fires, your ex tried to add me on Facebook
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