five shots of tequila, anal and 3 cigarettes. not my best idea on a saturday afternoon.
This last weekend single handedly took me off the liver transplant list
But I thought everyone had breakup sex?
the guy in the stall next to me, came in, farted, laughed, and proceeded to give himself some sort of hillbilly pep talk that included the phrase "big pussy".
Friends dont let friends get hit with a flaming baton without warning
Just write off about 10000+ brain cells and 6 months of your lifespan.
Sounds like a normal friday night
I jumped on his cock in 2 seconds flat. Thanks mom for sending me to gymnastics when I was a kid.
I just watched dragonflies fucking. You can't match that level of geek.
You'd be amazed at how difficult it is to find pics of the helicopter dick
I am very proud of your internet skills
He has a shower chair now. So he sits and watches me shower. It's kind of creepy.
Dude, I found out having naked people in your car is a felony.. Now were all fucked.
It wasn't so much a one night stand as much as one night she puked on my nightstand.
Dan I was a mess I made out with a 40 yr old who gave me a wad of cash for Christmas. Like wtf
We had sex during an intermission, then the second period. The bruins better win. Missing a period isn't worth having sex with him
Also, if he asks how he's doing orally I can probably ask if we're exchanging Christmas presents?
Randomize
