Solid performance last night. Wanna be fuck buddies?
i just smoke outta the biggest bowl i've ever seen. the kid was totally compensating for a tiny weeenie.
just found out my sister was breast fed and i was not...pretty upset about that.
She literally thanked me for asking before I put in her ass
You say "I'm in class" like it matters... I'm getting a little tired of having to smoke by myself at 4:20 because you're in class.
I'm not sure, but I think she had a tampon in when we fucked
I am pretty sure they consider me one of the "bros". They compliment girl's racks to me and are the human forms of dick-be-gone. They won't sleep with me more than once cause it's "weird", or let any "untrustworthy boys" sleep with me and I still help them get laid. Not...fair...
i figure if i show enough tits, no one will notice my eyebrows.
There is a guy here calling himself the pants less weed fairy
You came out of your room naked under your open robe with a mouth full of brownie on a stick and grabbed a fistful of fruit loops and shoved them into your already full mouth.
He got you flowers. How bad can the sex really be?
I don't like pregnant me. I eat very large burritos, I don't like having sex and I can't even finish a Blue Moon.
My mother just set me up with the son of the man I fucked last weekend. I could crawl under a rock and die OR I could remember the rules of genetics and hope that JR takes after daddy. Wish me luck...
How dare sober me try to tell drunk me I can't eat the applesauce in the fridge! Stingy bitch IM EATING THE APPLESAUCE! you can tell sober me I said that.
I feel like the physical embodiment of the pot leaf eyes smiley face
Randomize