At any point in time, have you stopped and thought "I wonder how high Willie Nelson is right now?
So how was awkward coffee with forgets-your-name?
I'm cleaning the house. And I can't stop listening to Enrique Iglesias. Am I gay?
I even have the new album if that helps you make a decision.
we were pretty classy up until the second keg
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
Clothes are such an inconvenience.
after watching ten minutes of "the decision," I conclude that King Lebron has more influence on America than Barak Obama. I love our countries values.
after giving each other head, we had a really nice post-oral heart to heart. found out he lost his virginity in a threesome.
Look, we all have our slutty phases. Mine is just forever.
Last I saw him was around 10 this morning. He was passed out on the porch with his head under the barbeque cover and there were cups of orange juice around him as well as loose tobacco spread everywhere. Good luck getting a hold of him.
Dude, I had no choice. I was defending my genitals.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
Sounds good. I'm hoping to have my life together by next week but you never know I guess.
One of my favorite March activities is cropdusting people while wearing a kilt.
if jesus wore shoes made out of pure flavor and hurricane kicked u in the face thats how it feels to eat pizza bites right now
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