where are you?
in the room with the baby pig
k im coming soon
my 3 year old cousin just woke up screaming "IT WON'T GO DOWN!'
Whatever, you were 10 deep and there was a hot tub. No judgment.
We made a late night liquor run, made margaritas and bloody marys and then retreated to opposite sides of the house to drink them. Alone.
You guys make me sad
You misspelled jealous there
Because if the best sex I've ever had was with a gay guy, then God help me.
I made out with all three roommates...I didnt realize that was actually an awkward situation.
You were naked too, so it cancels out. We're straight.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
you're no funn. i shall go consult my friend vodka on this matter.
HOW THE FUCK CAN YOU NOT REMEMBER WHIPPING IT OUT AND PUTTING ON THE BAR?
By the way, you're banned for life.
i don't think fitbit tracks "flipping the fuck out" as activity.
My hair tie broke, stole my one-night stands daughters pink sparkly one. BEST hair-tie I have ever used...
He was like "why do you look so cute today?" and I said "I showered" and he laughed. I wasn't making a joke
I am mildly hung over. Decided pants are very unnecessary right now.
"They won't do it. I'm in the middle of darkness. " and "Probably going to die. I've been walking for 50 minutes in one direction" are the last texts I got from Steve
Randomize
