Bro can a girl get pregnant if i jizz in her mouth?
hahahahahahahahahahaha
I peed while puking? Even better
Yes you most deff did. Ultimate multi tasker you are
I kinda look like a classier blonde kenny powers.
She invited me to an Eagles game, I mean that is almost better then if she told me she could only function with large amounts of semen in her system at all times.
chasing shots of tequilla with sun chips. its doable but not recommended
"Does your mom know how big your cock is?" Worst dirty talk I've ever had.
I made him go down on me for 40 mins then pretended to pass out. I swear, I'm like a boy.
mom just made me 'sorry-you-have-hpv-pancakes'
Just watched a deer get gangbanged in my front yard by 5 bucks. Wtf animal kingdom
I was up all night on suicide watch. Dave was wasted and tried to strangle himself. With his own hands.
And on that day, Satan said; "Let there be the friend zone and let us get fucking high." while Jesus silently cried in the background.
The point remains that this is the setup for some great stories
Or terrible, horrifying, traumatic experiences
great clearly means different things to us
In local news, attempts to hide phone from extremely drunk self prove unsuccessful for Dallas woman.
I'm afraid I might run into that fat chick that sucked on me in the hospital parking lot while her friend cried in the car next to us, but I may be willing to take that chance.
No, you made a silk sheet toga and held up a dildo calling yourself "The Statue of Puberty". People made pilgrimages from the other party down the block to see you.
Randomize
