whats a polygalesbian?
lesbian polygamists..duh.
Just got a script for 120 vicodin with 6 refills. I feel like michael jackson.
I could make treat bags
i wish i was a boy too so i knew what a blow job felt like
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
She can't really be mad at me. I made you two sisters... Dick sisters.
i just woke up to a text from him apologizing for making me eat a full lemon
so why was i the only one who woke up with ham stuck to my ass?
I walked in and she was kneeling on the ground with no pants on, throwing up, and holding the puppy. It was one of those moments, where i was like damn i wish i had my camera.
we went 3 years between hookups and she got a lot better. Amanda's moving way up the booty call pecking order.
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
He tried to convince me that it wasn't really that small and all he had to do was pull back the groin fat. It was still small.
i had a super strange, mommy/daddy issuestastic, mildly freudian, i-might-as-well-become-a-stripper-now-and-stop-fighting-the-inevitable dream last night :(
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
you should just get a floor plan of your dorm and start checking off rooms.
Do you recall asking me to zip line through your wedding dressed as a bleeding angel?
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