This is clearly one of those "A hole's a hole" situations
My insides feel lik shag carpet. It is awesome
She just did a myspace photoshoot with her baby
My niece just threw up all over me. My sister's breastmilk was on my face. This is like a fucked-up porno gone terribly wrong.
no seriously, she's legit pissed i'm late to lunch because i was watching full house. there's obviously no future here.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
We fucked in my basement while hiding from the cops.. And now his Facebook picture is him and others holding up there MIP's in front of my house.. I feel obligated to add him as a friend.
it only took 2 hours but we managed to melt the purity ring down with a butane torch
Using your ex girlfriend's little brother to pick up women at the a&p: priceless
Nothing says "I support my fellow man" like taking your friends recently divorced dad to a strip club and bar hopping with us to get him laid by an upgrade.
Is it wrong I want to seduce my ex to prove the point to his current gf he's an ass?
when the repo soundtrack came on in the middle of us having sex i realized it was about time that i clear out my itunes library
PENIS EMOJIS WOULD MAKE MY LIFE SO MUCH EASIER GAH WHY DOES THE WORLD HATE ME
if I blackout nd am found tomorrow w butterfly hairclips on my nipples and my habd down my pants tell my family I am sorry
You can say goodbye to our security deposit.
Already? What he do?
Opened a bag of topsoil at the party and spread it all over the living room. TOPSOIL!
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