Just heard her singing at the school concert... I am honored my penis was touched by those pipes
im so poor im using the bottom of my laptop to heat my food.
Hello everyone will one of you please inform me on why I woke up in a cardboard recycle dumpster with no shirt and a stuffed animal? I want to hear this explanation.
Your godly.
i found him! he's on the front porch using a bag of potting soil as a pillow. i forgot i left him there.
I asked if he wanted to come over and he said he was busy. Then I sent him a pic of me in the bath with the bottle of wine I already finished and all of a sudden he was free. Booty calls are too easy.
It was either the harsh truths I was divulging or the liquor..... But either way, I made mom puke
Happiness is watching your asshole boss' police DUI video.
You better keep a close eye on your uterus tonight cause I am looking good.
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
Woke up to a sex noise notice under my door...he gets a A+ for proformance and ill be seeing him again.
I don't know what to think. Also, I decided to take a bath...sorry in advance if I flood the bathroom.
I'm sort of afraid for my life tho. If the 4th of July can be the way it was a DMX show is capable of anything
Last night you snap chatted some chick a pic of bottle service with the caption "send tits"
You came out in nothing but lingerie and a Jedi robe claiming you needed more of those baby hot dog things or you were gonna go all Sith on us
These rednecks don't fuck around. This party is completely BYOB and we now have 6 kegs, 3 of which have already been emptied.
Randomize