somehow writing 'not a skank' on yur boobs doesn't really make you look less skanky...
and then she yelled "im going to fuck the next guy that walks by me". so ya thats how i lost my virginity
there was some random girl that nobody really knew, standing in the corner trying to shave her armpits with a plastic butter knife.
and when he finished he handed me a baby wipe so i could clean up. i'm ok with the fact that he has kids, but not sure how to react to this.
the fire alarm went off. we werent sure whether to leave or turn the music up louder
i know and i thought i was only capable of loving dick and drugs, im so happy
I actually kinda like her but everyone else hates her, so consider it a third party grudgefuck.
You're really doing everyone a disservice by wearing pants all the time.
in line at jewel. the cashier is puking in a garbage can while ringing up customers. glad to know im not the only one that 2012 is kicking in the face already.
She was giving me head while we were in my tree house, my mom then came out to let the dog out so she stopped so I would stop groaning, was it good? You tell me
I'd say things got weird when I started doing lines of molly in the box.
The family next to you was not pleased
I just figured out the time exactly by how many shots and beers that I've had since this morning. I either have a terrible problem, or a great solution.
If it exists, I've probably pregamed it.
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
Stranded. In bathroom stall. No toilet paper. I repeat NO TOILET PAPER! Assistance needed asap. GO! GO! GO!
Randomize
