after you threw up, you tried to prove you were sober by reading the ingredients off the shampoo bottles
My lack of memory is directly related to being friends with you.
this mix will be the most desperate cry for affection in the history of itunes.
Were taking his cast off tonite. Need a saw and a gameplan. Meet us at rosies in 30.
don't forget friday is see who can get the most free drinks at the gay bar contest. winner gets $50
6 beers and it feels like I've been drinking water... Daiquiri time
I'll be there soon. I expect Advil and a bucket of kittens when I arrive.
Lol I screamed "GOT AN ORDER OF VERSACE TACOS UP" and the whole kitchen was just like who the fuck is this kid
well what the fuck is the POINT of teetotal mardi gras
I just set my acrylic nail on fire while trying to light my blunt
What happened to no more shots?
It went out the window just like my dreams
That's why i need nudes. Plutonic nudes.
I feel like there's def a learning curve to the sex swing
Like did he really think I just hit him up for dick !? It's 11:30 am , these ain't hoe hours
Just got drunk at the Cheesecake Factory again. Made me think of you.
That's the nicest thing anyone's ever said to me.
Randomize
