Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
Hands down the best time I've ever had barfing.
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
marching band practice is quite the interesting soundtrack to sex
Don't worry we found her. Somehow she ended up on my roof with 2 bar stools
we didnt even make it to the club...the two of us were sharing a plastc bag in the taxi puking into it.
i was congratulating myself on not falling down the stairs when i walked into the wall. it's like one step forward, two steps into the fucking wall
Dedicating my hangover to whoever the hell I hooked up with in the bathroom last night.
just kidding, dedicating it to the gods of mexican food. omnomnom
The air was thick with penises
I thought it was a drawer and tried to pull it out and it wasnt a drawer it was the police call button. I hate everything.
when I came to get Jamie there was a cop standing outside with her, made me roll down my window to tell me "she's got to go cause she won't keep her shirt buttoned"
Sex on acid. Try it. I thought we were fucking in outer space with fireworks inside a rocketship car. Best.
Yes I am wallowing. There is a significant lack of cookie dough
all i've had to eat today is leftover bday cake and a shot of tequila.
welcome to college.
I swear if you laugh while im moaning i will immediately stop and go home.
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