Why did we buy the only spinning apartment on campus?
We are allowed to think Jacob from Twilight is hot in 468 days!
I don't know what is sadder, the fact that you figured that out or the fact that I can't wait until then!!
she has double-d's AND she knows what level Pidgeot evolves. don't tell me she's not a keeper
She wont be able to take it all. I'll use a shoe horn to get it in if I have to.
I give him a gold star every time I orgasm. His room looks like he's freaking King Midas.
Last time i was there we saw the window of the pizza place we were at get busted, we were pulled out of a taxi to be questioned by the cops, and we peed outside a waffle house. I'm in.
well i mean she can't stop a weed based friendship...its like a trying to stop a bomb or a really fast train...
Just realized I could have five different dicks in me the day of valentines day but no real date. My life
somehow this went from sexting to explaining my eating disorder.
A unicorn in pinstripe pants just got on the J at Dolores stop. It can only be a good night
He showed me a picture of his family on Instagram and his dad was my Sugar Daddy. ABORT.
it was the kind of sex that I don't even know how my hair extentions are still in
Uh oh. Put down the vodka cancel the clowns and get rid of the donkey
The REAL engagement ring is the jeweled butt plug.
It's to the point where if a guy can so much as find my clit, I'll consider him amazing in bed
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