A donut and a mojito for breakfast...Helloooooo Derby Wekkend!
Like... Chilling at home with a movie, hang out? Or have sexual intercourse in the backseat if his car, hang out?
She put up a picture of her grandmother on facebook, looks like the lazy eye runs in the family
come over after work tomorrow, liz and i will make all of your wildest dreams come true. so long as your wildest dreams involve drinking champagne at my house with two girls who won't have sex with you.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
There are several different types of life sentences in my purse right now.
Who spent today in nothing but a vajazzle and candy thong? SORRY NOT SORRY
So hungover. I dropped my keys and leaning over seemed a terrible idea. Instead I took my shoe off in the middle of the street and use my toes to pick them up. Think I'm a genius.
BUT YOU MUST FINISH YOUR QUEST
TO FIND THE HOLY GRAIL
AND GET DRUNK OFF YOUR ASS BY DRINKING OUT OF IT
Not sure. He doesn't know where New York is on a map but he gives an incredible spanking.
Who cares about New York?
She's lucky her pussy is worth listening to her ramble about bedroom furniture for 30 minutes
They need to eat meat, go down on me the first time, every time, and know how to pull my hair. And there's a height requirement for this ride
Currently googling hangover cures, which looks a lot like working from the perspective of my boss.
Pretty sure we had a civil war reenactment in your kitchen at 4am.
That would explain the cannon.
I really wanna treat my body good. Because i plan on doing drugs
Randomize
