sometimes I tug on my anal hairs for pleasure
you've officially gone too far. we are no longer friends
We got them high and they had an hour long debate on the best way to get cum out of eyes.
you better fuck at least one or both of them.
super high. so of course there was a shoot out at the bank. there are 20 cop cars no lie. if i make it out of this i will never smoke again
After Sake bombs he tried to puke into an alluminum beer bottle and shot vomit streaks in a perfect V out the sides of his mouth and hit BOTH girls he had bought drinks for that night. He was like an Icon of Cock-blocking yourself.
Also, never say you're cool with a threesome if they ask. That shit's a trap.
You need to simmer down or I'm going to buy you a labia leash.
What's the sex policy on a school bus? Because I dibs back seat.
Sex allowed. Dress code is neon and obnoxious.
We are gonna die. I wanna enforce the "no jumping out of moving vehicles" policy. And how are we gonna get a school bus through mcdonalds drive thru?
At this point can I suggest a mail away bride. You judge Nick but you are a strange dude and that may be your ticket.
Can't tonight. I'm supposed to get drugs for some college kids. Just doin my part in helping to enlight america's future
Why am I getting texts saying are you ready for this butthole? Help
You said that when your ex gave you a blowjob her mouth was like velvet
You left your underwear in a sandwich bag on my kitchen counter.
How does one go about breaking up with their bf on vacation?
Idk how I even got accepted into college because literally the only things my brain ever thinks about are YouTube videos of baby animals and sex.
Somehow my life has turned in to drug deals at the bar, and illegally camping on a mountain because I have no where else to live.
Randomize
