I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
It's not true, it's not true! She's too full of cheese to have sexy time!
Never eat 3 McGriddles and drink a carton of milk. It's like you're successfully killing self but you're alive.
I may do that, fyi I'm even more sore than I was yesterday. It's like the ghost of your dick is still inside me.
I had sex with her because I didn't want to hurt her feelings.. You're the one who told me I should be more sensitive.
I love my roommate; her alcohol problem, her proclivity for passing out on the living room couch, and her fucking awesome size d tits that can never remain clothed. Craigslist jackpot.
we found her in my closet eating a clove of garlic.
Her mom is home on her lunch break. Guess who's hiding In the Closet?
Also he wants to know a casual, consise way to ask a girl in a bar if he could eat her out. Think on that.
When theres a zombie apocalypse, i will be the only fat survivor. I ate chef boyardi ravioli with part of a pen for a fork
Nothing says love like couples STD testing
Nothing says breakup like the results
Totally shot down my boss for sex today. Approaching this weekend with a clear conscience and an untouched vagina.
So i came so hard i almost passed out, where has this vibrator been all my life?
No more pre-dentist shots, I just puked on my hygienist
Why do I always have at least 8 men with whom I am conducting some sort of poorly planned love experiment?
Randomize
