Good face, no body. And apparently her vagina is related to chewbaca.
You should have seen k-money last night. She was just hanging on to the toilet for half the night. By her fourth trip to puke, she started talking to it and was doing the voices for her and it. She kept saying "...we thank you for your continued business..." haha
what kind of morning-after breakfast implies 'thanks for the sex, but i'm not gonna call you ever again'?
It's nice to sit in the library and see the progression from freshman pledge to 6th year coke addict all at one table. Gotta love sororities
They let you pick the name that they announce for you at graduation. The professional world needs to prepare itself for papa smurf mcdonald.
he then proceeded to tear down my curtains, wrap them around his waist, and use the rod as his "rod"... you tell me how drunk he is...
there is no way i can order from that cashier at in n out after she tried helping me while i was drunkenly puking in their bathroom at 11 am
Women are fucking wierd. I have forgotten this. Divorce papers should come with a handbook.
nothing like a call from your drunk grandpa at midnight on a wednesday to ask your parents if you're registered to vote...
I remember him going "OH SHIT" when he saw you straddling me on the table. And it was like the best feeling ever.
Also there's a home game tomorrow and I thought about holding up a sign that says, "I madeout with #64 during orientation week" would that be inappropriate??
Please keep in mind you are asking relationship advice from a girl who fucked a guy just because we have the same name. Just keep that in mind.
This wine tastes amazing. It's like a fermented hug.
Do you think it's a bad sign of the outcome of the pregnancy test I'm about to take that I was eating a fudgsicle on the way into the drugstore? Would it make worse to tell you I also bought a big ass bag of Cornnuts?
I have to touch the horse lube. :-(
Randomize
