I'll bet she douches with gravy.
I was looking at some smoking pipes on amazon the other day and realized that work people could look at my history and do a drug test. So I immediately started looking at Sherlock Holmes hats.
Just shaved my vagina. It's been so long I forgot what it looked like. You need to come over right now.
I thought about donating plasma but thats not the way i want to find out that i have aids
She bent the beer can with her tongue. I'm scared of what she'll do to me
Whatever. I'm just trying to get my dick sucked while taking online harmonica lessons
Exactly. Motivated vaginas are the best kind of vagina
she visited to give me a bj between clients. Social work at its finest.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
And literally 4loko margaritas are callin my name. They're like "Hey girl come on over here I'll make you forget about grades and boys and it'll be a good idea to send everyone 55 snapchats of your cleavage" ok
Then he started caressing my eye brow. Like repetedly. For at least 15 minutes. It was strangely mesmerizing
i swear i just dislocated a hip staying still
Matt and I's climactic adventure has ended with Matt being hauled off to jail. And now his brother and I are having lunch and a beer.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
Was that you calling me at 4am asking to borrow a rubber ducky and a tampon?
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