her vagine was all disorganized.
yeah it was kind of like, i'm 27 and still live in a frat house.. you honestly expect me to have "moral fiber" and a "conscience"
New dating criteria: what kind of ex will this person be?
we were so desperate we resorted to lego blocks. nuff said.
Dude let's go to Saudi Arabia. They outlawed valentine's day. And probably love.
dude last night I threw my weed into my back yard. there is now a foot of snow. after an hour I found my weed. if I put that effort into school, i'd have a 4.0.
Thanks in advance for a great weekend. Sorry your roommates are going to hate you after I leave. They need to loosen up anyways.
It's all good, I've hated people for lesser reasons than being my ex boyfriend's favorite pro athlete of all time
Then he texted me that I was the "good kind" of fat.
My Canadian brought me three bottles of maple syrup, a sunflower, and a pair of Oakleys back to the states...he's either drunk or he loves me
i puked in the 2nd best shower and the couple fucking in the 1st didnt even pause so you might wanna hold off on that for a while
You HAVE to stop telling me about the shit you do drunk. I can't be both your brother AND your gay friend.
It's all fun and games until you have to pay the bar tab.
for not the first time in my life, my clothes are covered in piss and i'm standing in line waiting to buy pedialyte at a convenience store
Sex in the backyard? Check.
Randomize
