I just remembered we were doing butt clenching exercising with bar straws last night
YOURE GIVING A BLOW JOB TO THE BOY WHO SAYS "OH SNAP"
It's sad really how 5 am brings with it a distinction from drunken to pathetic.
Haha crisis adverted. Just told my dad I need to bone this guy. Nbd. He totes understands
Someone took a picture of their balls on my phone last night. BEAUTIFUL PACKAGE. I will find this man.
I'd hate to be 100% hetero. Pretty sure they have less orgies
There were four people in the car. The girls sure know how to blow. I think we almost crashed when the driver climaxed.
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Its not that it wasnt fun. Its just I got a tooth knocked out and that was my second time being arrested this year
Lift me 50ft in the air like a tow truck but with your penis
How high are you exactly
MY WHOLE FAMLY IS TALKING ABOUT MY BUTT
WAIT I'M COMING I WANT TO TALK ABOUT IT TOO
If it makes you feel any better, I can't find the goldfish I dropped like five minutes ago.
Could’ve gone my whole life not seeing a man snort coke off another man’s cock... but there it is...
I WANT GRASS AND TREES NOT SOMEONE SWINGING A SWORD AROUND
I WILL go to space. And if we find aliens I WILL fuck one. It’s the Marine Corps way
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