Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
how did your night go?
he asked for my myspace name.
Thanks for the three minutes of sex tonight.
loyola was giving a tour this morning and they all saw me in a half ripped off toga throwing up over the side of the dorm stairs
you don't even go to loyola anymore
having sex with him was like banging macgyver. he did the most amazing shit with the simplest things
Don't take this the wrong way but I just mistook a trash can for you
koolaid chicken. i marinated it for 2 hours and roasted it on a rock in a fire. it was bright blue and raw. but that shit was tasty
Ssssssssssshhhhhhhhhhhiiiiiiii!iiiiiiiiiitttttttttttttttssssssssssssshhhhhhhhooooooooowwwwwww. Letters for emphaSSIIISISEEEE!
Oh god, so much rum. I think I was in a shotgun wedding with a Bacardi promotion girl.
Dave when you find that upper decker at your house its from me but its for Jill not you
I'm like 80% sure we nearly got arrested because we threw fireworks at a car
That moment when the line ‘If you want a hot body you better work bitch’ in Britney Spears’ new song comes on as you’re using two forks to shovel enchilada into your mouth.
I feel like the first time i have to use my accident insurance its going to be in some sex mishap with you.
I'm determined to sit on that face.
is it bad that im laying on a beach towel in my room with my lights on high pretending to be tanning on the beach in the summer?
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