just saw an old couple make out...not too sure how I feel about it. though I will admit at one point I was thinking "oh yeah! get that!"
Waaait I'm alsleep in myt car somewhere
we were spooning and you were the big spoon but you insisted that I call you "the ladle"
I just watched my mom open a wine bottle with an electric drill. I have never been so proud.
HOW DID U BEAT A GAY GUY IN GAY CHICKEN?
Drunk versus high capture the flag: what team is everybody gonna be on?
I'm at a nursing home getting weed. Lol when times are tough, things tend to get a lil weird
Relaxed was like phase 1 of this phase 7 high
I think if you have sex on the couch it will psychologically damage it.
Just watched a girl lose her dignity at the corner...it's not even midnight
quick, give me some iron man trivia, i'm going to make this girl regret quoting tony stark in her tinder bio
We just took an Eskimo family picture.. It's pretty cute honestly
Yeah we fucked. I ran into her the next day, I had to pick up the girl scout cookies I ordered from her boyfriends kids.
Any chance the bar is open now? Also who's wedding is this?
One of the worst parts about living at my parents again is trying to hide how often I'm hungover, just quietly puked in the basement bathroom while my mom got ready for work
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