i just watched my husband get a prostate exam. sex is ruined for me.
Terrible. Enormous nipples with a small ring of boob on the outside. It looked like a tittie eclipse
I'm starving. my midnight snack, aka a teaspoon of cum, isn't holding me over
If I say "It's good enough" and I'm not talking about a sandwhich, that's your queue to stop me, you're supposed to be my friend.
Soo I have a handle of 100 proof captain, cupcakes, and nothing to get up for in the morning.. This blizzard is shaping up to be a great night.
only clue right now is the orange grease all on my clothes. debit card denied so I know something weird went down..
Maybe you need to change your pickup move. The "hey check these out" titty flash gets you the wrong kinda man.
I spent half an hours grinding with a drunk Harry Potter cosplayer at the con rave. Pretty sure I felt his wand.
Now I'm ashamed that I wore a bra
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
My mute roommate is using sign language to ask a guy to fuck her.
You walked in on us hooking up, hugged me, high fived him and unhooked my bra.. You claimed to be helping
I passed out while searching "symptoms of narcolepsy"...
Replacing my paralegal is easy. Replacing my favorite office fuck toy is a totally different story. Damn him for wanting to better himself instead of being my manwhore
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