i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
My mom just told me to drench my entire body in vodka for 20 minutes. I have never been this russian. no one has ever been this russian
I have a great idea. you just need to get pregnant.
Mother, no, i will not talk about this again. Please stop planning my unborn daughters life. I will not put her in pagents. That is trashy. Stop watching toddlers in tiaras. It is also trashy. I love you.
and apparently i was drunk enough to follow up with "I'd let me touch your boobs" ... not my best line.
i just did the math...im a product of my mothers birthday sex
He went into the alley to piss and came back a minute later with a case of Bud Select. I'm speechless.
I'll be on pinterest all night planning crafty things to do with my cats in 10 years.
I just got carded by a ten year old.
I feel so much better about my break up knowing that he's having his 26th birthday at Rollar kingdom\n
I want to go to a gay rodeo for my cross country road trip. It'll be like my very own homo country boy pilgrimage to the holy land.
Im fairly sure two chicks roofied me last night. Suckers. I love free drugs.
I think I just smoked a piece of your foot. Were u picking your feet by the weed?
Is this the point in which we come to terms with our lesbianism or is that after you send me more ass pics...
I mean it's a good blow job, but it's not worth the four hour round trip.
I have a bottle of vodka wrapped in a leg warmer in my purse. This is what it takes to get through Christmas with my family.
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