talk about how much treatments for your hpv hurts
farters have to be the big spoon...
Rylan was made in your driveway. Just thought, as godfather, you should know.
my little sister told my dad she found willy wonka's golden ticket in the backseat of my car. now my dad knows my boyfriend uses magnums.
Well fuck that. I mean, I made out with my cousin once. Who gives a fuck.
Do any of you want to be on a three way call with me while this girl masturbates in 10 min? You can't talk
Oh god I can't handle any more dudes. I just walk of shamed to work wearing a guy's boxers and a life jacket. This summer is going to kill me.
I have a way to get him back. you're going to have to take one for the team and make a visit to the health department. you in?
Just bartered a McD's cheeseburger and fries for two pitchers. Oregon Trail ain't got shit on me.
These pissing matches have to stop. They led to last night's scotch through the nose shots. I'll never smell again.
I'm on the toilet with no toilet paper. When are you coming over? I'm contemplating on just staying here until you arrive.
In bathroom. Hand in air with cell phone. Help.
Sex on the trampoline with your two best friends cheering you on: PRICELESS.
Would you still love me if I got a Whatever Forever tattoo? It's like the Emo kids' Live Laugh Love
Never in my life did I expect to see Eric's mom in a cheerleader outfit along with other women
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