What's proper 1 nite stand etiquette?
Say hi to his dad and make him some breakfast.
i dont think there is any level of not caring that i havent covered in the last month
look, i may have sacrified a 20% assignment for a sprite. this is what hangovers do to me.
Jager Bombs are cool, but hydrogen bombs are where it's at. Sparks and jager equals instant black out, I mistakenly tried eating a cigarette thinking it was a nacho.
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
the people going to church this morning while i was walking home did not seem as pleased as i was with how many beads i earned last night
He literally just walked in some random persons house and walked right to they're pantry. Then five minutes later he walks out with pop-tarts, mac and cheese, and captain morgan. We need to chill with this kid more often.
I'm eating mac and cheese for dinner that way when I puke later it'll be festive halloween orange.
We got really high and decided it would be a good idea to wash towels in the dishwasher. I left before I could see the final result.
he definitely had sex before you were fully potty trained.
I just let my hand run under cold water for five minutes. I couldn't stop staring at it and the only things I could think about were how amazing it felt, how cool water was, and what a wonderful world it is that we live in. Reasons why I don't smoke...
this is terrible I feel like i'm trapped in a cage with a wild republican
Do you hit a new low in life when you have to carry around a puke bag in your purse when you're hungover?
NO FUCKING RANDOMS IN AN ALLEY
I think she lost me at about the point where the words “Ice Cream Enema” were spoken.
Randomize
