Went to gas station for smokes. three cops pulled in. got gas i didn't need. found diff gas station.
good choice.
You should come over. I am making a celebratory I got laid by a huge penis cake.
He came on my chest. Sat back and said "hey it sorta looks like lake michigan!" kill me now...
you got thrown out for pissing in a cup in the corner. you told one guy it was okay because you went to college and that he wouldn't understand
I am definitely the only sober one on this train. And the only one not wearing a business suit. Wow, Monday Korea.
You don't know how badly I want to just hold you as a soup spoon holds a bisque
No but I was fuckin done when I realized my acrylic nail caught fire when I was hitting the bong.
I feel like I should throw some tampons around my workspace so everyone will know what's really going on
You both sound like you need to get shit faced, fight it out, and have makeup sex.
This guy kept trying to use "see? I'm clean. Cleared by the plasma place today." as a pick up line. This is not okay.
Currently hot boxing a fort I made on our snow day... This is legendary
If you're going to do that you're going to need a pleather suit.
My vagina needs a break, I had to ice it with a beer bottle last night.
I don't even care if you were high. The fact that I've been begging for us to have those cinnamon rolls for months and you didn't even save me one is not ok.
It's a sad day when you're not really phased by the McChicken video only because you've seen weirder porn.
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