I don't know what you were told but i for sure didn't sleep with any one but steve's couch.
I told him it tasted like his mom..needless to say we were asked to leave.
hey what are you doing
hooking up with some marlborough girl. shes gorgeous!
i texted you because i like you, and i told my freinds you were my fiance. but sine we're not dating you're not cheating and i'm pathetic
one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I'm watching i used to be fat. I've been doing crunches for the last half hour yelling at the slut on tv to stop crying and do crunches.
I woke up with cheeseburger in my mouth and a deep sense of accomplishment.
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
The bartender cut me off so I peed in the corner. How no one noticed I have no idea.
So should I finish watching Space Jam and then get head? Or get head while secretly watching Space Jam?
They're showing aladdin at the bar my birthday is complete
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
sometimes a perk of being a drug dealer is amazon gift cards. who knew?
danced like there was no tomorrow. surprise. there's a tomorrow
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
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