i actually looked down at my cock today and said "whoa buddy, you need a haircut....(grimace) and a shower"
we are all sexual creatures
yea maybe. but you're not. you're not getting any.
The worst thing that has ever happened to me happened today. I was taking donations at goodwill and someone donated a clearly used vibrator
Being pregnant is so damn inconvenient for my sex life.
I envy you so much. I get girls who pee on my floor and you get girls who leave in the middle of the night
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
You now know someone who has just successfully talked his way out of being arrested for breaking into the town library at midnight. Ive been home for too long.
Someone better explain the burnt stove marks on my bed.
We now know how the night ended in arrest according to the flip camera I did 10 handle pulls and beer bonged a 40. My life choices are getting worse and worse this is your fault.
Literally just saw a 7 year old intently rub his penis on the metro. I'm not ready for this
Happy "I'm glad our dad made us sisters and then summarily downgraded himself to sperm donor" day.
Is it weird that sometimes I like to have sex for the health benefits and workout more than the pleasure
And I hope you're not misinterpreting us fucking as me trying to win you back. The sex is good and girls have needs.
I'm not gonna be naked if your not here. Thats like a waste of nakedness
You’ve seen my tits of course he broke his wedding vows
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