we have officially lost it.
I just want to sing "highway to the danger zone" when I'm taking his pants off.
the guy that filmed erin andrews naked got 27 months in jail. Every man that's seen it should send him cigs and a nail file baked in a cake. We owe it to him.
Hey, I can't get ahold of Tommy. Let him know his ex-girlfriend is pregnant.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
I could end up kidnapped. Or worse, the night will be really awkward.
and then you seriously asked him to senior prom..which freaked him out since you told him earlier you were 22
He woke up in the ambulance thinking he was still in the club.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
I really don't want to. I just don't know how to nicely say "dude I'm having a rough time in life right now and I just need to dress like a stripper cop, get shit faced, and have dirty crazy sex"
He told me about how he pissed his pants last weekend like it was a normal part of conversation. Within 10 minutes I was going home with him. I think he put me under some kind of spell.
Of all the things that can be stripped of me i'll be damned if it's my vanity
This day took a left turn at "This is your going away party, I got a bunch of blow."
He said he was Greek American and that is why my legs slammed shut. During the World Cup there are only Americans.
sitting in a shitty karaoke bar playing pokemon go and drinking a mimosa. how is your sunday night
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