he just asked if i would like him to change his diet so his jizz tastes better. keeper? i think so.
I don't know. The next thing I remember we were in the walmart parking lot making out.
My friend is getting herself a tramp stamp that says "property of the half blood prince".
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
The guy in 209 is masturbating with the door cracked again
Did you ask last night's taxi driver about his penis hygiene?
After i black out, be a good friend and point me to the direction of a girl with daddy issues, any girl would do just fine
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Shots. Renamed a guy (he looked like a Scott to me), running, bloody Marys, walk to Safeway, donuts, ride home from someones husband, Nurse Jackie. FIN.
you know it was a successful halloween when you wake up and have a firecracker in your tits
I just want to give face wipes a shout out for being there when im too tired or high to wash my face at night
Tell me again why we had to Facebook stalk your therapist?
why is there a porcupine in the kitchen
when i woke up w mysterious sticky crap in my hair, i assumed i had another blackout hookup. nope. turns out i made PBJ and proceeded to pass out in it. i ate the evidence when i woke up.
A total of 3 guys left my apartment this morning. That was my first clue to my black out endeavors last night. Gotta love wine Wednesdays.
Randomize
