I just spent twenty minutes with brandons dad explaining why head isnt typically considered sex...can we say awkward?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
We fish bowled my car and anna told us a story about time travel and part of it had people melted into the side of a boat and i imagined them being melted into my car moaning in pain and then we got scared and thought zombies were outside and couldn't leave for a while.
She is making me post-sex grilled cheese at 2 am wearing only shorts and cowboy boots. I am so in love
well when i got there she was attempting to stick the cat in her mouth.. so maybe you should go check on her
I know this is weird, but can you ask your girlfriend if she has my mailbox?
Seriously?
100%
90 In a 65. Talked my way out of it with the i have to poop story. i am the ticket jesus
how do I tell the students with a crush on me, that yes, I am open to receiving blowjobs in exchange for grades?
Last I remember we played rock paper scissors for who would fuck the guy with cowboy boots on and I won..
Omg. I'm making you a chocolate and "herb" birthday cake and using joints for candles. I'm gunna need moms help with this!
There's no way you didn't at least start out with a dick. I obviously know there isn't one now, but there is no way that you were born a girl
I was basically just fingering myself and thinking about space.
She wore her engagement ring the whole time we fucked. I hate her fiancee, so it was cool
I need to get some goddam control over my hormones
She said she didn't care that I was gay and wants to ride the fucking rainbow
Randomize
