Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
He told me I took off my shirt, asked for the latino thunder and jumped on him. I want to question this but it sounds too much like me.
It was the third Sunday in a row that I woke up in his bathtub. So no our sex life isn't that great anymore.
Just gave a gay guy pointers on how to make anal not hurt. Reevaluation of life choices: in progress.
I don't remember its real name, I just call it the Harrison Ford Cush after that idea with the Indiana Jones mask. I should just get high and sell people my ideas for their Halloween costumes all the time. I'd make a fucking fortune.
I called her 20 times. Apparently she went home to do MORE shots before bed. Didnt miss me until this morning. WHO FORGETS THEIR HIGHSCHOOL SISTER AT A FRAT?
He asked me if the reason I slept around is because I grew up in a broken home. I am so done fucking Christians.
We broke into her grandpa's pool at 2 am and I held my underwear out the window on the way home.
I have never fucking hated the horrible sound of dozens of off-key recorders BLARING their fucked rendition of "Fais Do-Do" in unison against the screams of an adult male... more than I do now. This is why people avoid teaching. Kill me. End it all.
Get his dick out of your ass and put on some pants we're here
I SWEAR TO GOD IF SHE FUCKS WITH OUR GOLD GENE POOL
Ugh I don't want to adult today. I need like a dozen more coffees. Or cookies. They're interchangeable.
She asked what the dent on the hood of my car was from..i think she knows we had sex up there
You have thirteen minutes to get here if you want to get back together. Otherwise I'm getting digits from the waitress.
Randomize