In regards to your tweet: as its been said on all of those posters on ffffound: keep calm and carry on
how was that guy you hooked up with?
i used to think blowing a .05 was a good thing
I though she ruined it by crying, then I realized it wasn’t a tear, it was my great aim. It turned out to be beautiful.
I have beard burns on my inner thighs. I'd say last night went pretty well.
I feel like I had a lobotomy last night. I blacked out. Did we try to stick my Penis in a beer bottle?
FYI, your girlfriend is on her way to the ER. She tried to balance a bottle of jack on her chest. Smashed toes, blood all over patio. Call her, kinda funny though.
He said he wanted to have butt sex with me and curl up with me after and just be near me. Then he passed out.
I am not sure which is more amazing; The fact that she offered me sex, beer AND nachos, or that she can properly use a semi-colon at her current blood alcohol level.
I fucking love my neighbors. I offered him chocolate and somehow it turned into a sexual proposition.
Lets just say that a certain piercing set off certain alarms when I went thru the airport detector/scanner thingie. David was high fived like 12 times.
Guess who figured out you can fit an entire bottle of champagne in a big Subway cup. Open container laws my ass.
My condoms might be a little big for you but hey, a big sweater is better than no sweater at all when it's cold right?
I feel like weed makes my smarter. I'm watching the stocks and the way I understand if, do not invest in Yahoo right now because they are not fit for that.
I am actually offended he hasn't asked me to sleep with him yet to get better grades...I wanted the whole college experience.
Should I give the penis ring toss game to good will or garbage
Randomize
