Good. You are like the clit whisperer.
can you please tell me why I'm bleeding so heavily from my ass and all my makeup is gone?
Taking my final with a coffee mug full of keystone... best semester ever.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
Had to go to the urgent for a physical and I gave them my fake. Nurse was a sport though
Guess who just rode home in a cop car?! Your Fav flamingo
And now we should drink to that moment where you realize you didn't exactly think things through.
No I just rolled on the floor giggling. I think that's the equivalent to a post sex victory dance.
I think I might be harboring a Canadian in my womb.
He told me he was married and then fingered me on the kitchen counter. It was awkward to explaining the broken toaster to my roommates this morning...
so I found out I could dislocate my shoulders on demand while I was trippin on e last night...
No just a list of 20 of my favorite things
Where are penises on the list
Where am I on the list
Under penises
fuck school, let's just become the worst strippers ever
It actually wasn't the first time that a guy I just met ate me out in the back seat of his car in a starbucks parking lot in the middle of the day.
She’s a Vegas 8, which makes her an Oklahoma 27
Randomize
