Just FYI I rubbed poison oak on all your sheets and blankets so we all will know who you hooked up with (in about a day)
I've decided to sign up for a porn membership, but it's 10:30 and I'm going to wait an hour an a half because I don't want to waste a whole day of my month long membership. Fuck this economy.
I'm scared at the amount of beastiality in this conversation.
I came over to his house for a party and realized I was quoted on the fridge... "How'd I get rug burn on my face?" And yes, my name was right next to it!
I can do it, this is my punishment and I will accept it, plus id like to see the look on peoples faces when I throw up on them
Europe's "the final countdown" was playing. It was pretty much amnesty for anything that might happen the rest of the night. It's a rule.
Okay! I've got my sketchbook, my purse, my coat, and a knife hidden in my cleavage. I'm ready for to meet my blind date~
Was I holding a cat when you saw me? Because that was the height of that party for me.
I think I'm gonna quit partying for awhile. Piercing my own nose is where I draw the line.
If you quit, you're not going to stick to our game plan of dead by 40. I will not be in the titty bar nursing home without you damning
Damnit.
If you can't drink with the big boys, give up your beer and go back to the playpen
Well the streak is over, I saw a penis today
It's days like today that make me happy I'm not a porn star.
he's like the highest ranking tongue wizard i know.
You were so drunk, you kept telling everyone you had a platinum vagina.
Randomize
