If God's watching us, we might as well be entertaining
Still in Rome. Hooked up with frat boy from SoCal that's studying abroad. He said he was 1/8 italian. I'll take it.
Before you say anything, my vagine does NOT discriminate against young dads
What color are my eyes?
Ummmm... 34 C?
I bought an american flag today and by god im gonna fuck someone on it
I'm just gonna pretend you didn't ask me that. I'll sweep that shattered moment of our friendship under the shame rug.
is anything happening tonight?? I'm soooo in need of a tasteful and healthy bender.
He put on a roller derby documentary. It was either bore myself to death watching that or take off my dress. He was very appreciative.
It's Been a while since I puked in vomit bush. I hope it doesn't feel neglected
We turned a wake into a bar crawl.
Dude I pissed in her little brother's closet and when I tried to flush the doorknob her parents came out and saw me standing there naked, no more ambien for me
I'm always down for nudity.
These girls next to us are doing shots called bath salts. Sadly this is the classiest bar I've been to since i moved to PA
I have serious attachment issues. I just realized how long its been since ive smoked out of my bong and I feel guilty for dis owning it this week
He has an 8 pack! HE HAS AN 8 PACK!!!!
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