I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
you might want to delete the history when you're done using the computer at work. did you ever find out what the white balls in your throat were?
did i get hit in the head with a hammer? someone just asked me...
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
Yeah he gave the rest of the brownies to the bouncer that took his fake
all of the sudden, the other guy at the bar who was celebrating his birthday got a super inspired look on his face and then screamed at me ''our parents fucked on the same day!''
im sorry for trying to flush a roll of toilet paper down with my puke. probably not great for your toilet
He was having Sex and you yelled 'hot and dangerous!" and he responded with "if you're one of us then roll with us!" when he went to he bathroom I saw her getting dressed, looking mortified.
Apparently that big girl from last night tried to take me upstairs when I was blacked out and all I did was grab Qs arm and whisper 'don't let her take me'
That moment when you notice a tiny IR camera pointing at you, in your bed, at the apartment you found on Craigslist.
maybe if I avoid him long enough we could skip the talking part of "we need to talk"
I think snapchat is trying to tell you something. It's saying your boobs were meant to be seen by his family.
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
I sort of feel bad for this orthodontist. The things that have been in my mouth in the past 12 hours aren't exactly socially acceptable.
Randomize
