Courtney? Is that you? I have pictures of this very same night.
I mean roof. it goes up. its important day. you should recongziw it.
You're drunk. Make complete sentences.
It's not luke its my birthday or anything. Mike, understand.
I can't believe you let me try to pierce your nipple with a dart last night
Breakfast of vicodin and eggs out of a solo cup at about three in the afternoon on a wednesday...I have my life together
so literally, as soon as i tripped and fell and hit the floor the earthquake started. hows THAT for a self esteem boost?
we're doing beer bongs from the windmill...epic
The crowning achievement of my weekend was hooking up with someone I'm at least facebook friends with.
I guess I'll put a green shirt on. Also, I just snorted some protein shake power. That doesn't have anything to do with St. Patrick's Day. I just wanted you to know in case i die.
Is 9am too early to be eating a mozzarella stick I found in my purse? Yeah didnt think so. The fact that it tastes like vomit is concerning but not importanta.
Topless dodge ball cldnt top that
Licking pop rocks off a stranger's washboard abs and kissing strangers young enough to be my kid. Yeah, it was THAT kind of party last night
This is the I'm sorry text for running around yelling don't shit on my rainbow, end up in the fetal position crying at 4 am in my car because someone shit on my rainbow
I woke up naked and only wearing cowboy boots, wrapped in a curtain that was still attached to the pole
Don't tell me I can do whatever makes me happy while also saying I have to put on pants.
What's with guys asking if I wanna "kick it" like I'm some fucking 19 year old
Randomize
