yes i saw that this morning. it was my mailbox.
He asked me how my body knew that a month was up when it was time for my period.
And next time, don't pick a fight with me when you're naked. That's just not fair
his penis is PERFECT
I want to put it in a shoebox and place cottonbls around it to protect it from any harm
or knit it little hat
I wore my front clasp bra so he would have to prove his sobriety to me before we had sex.
Our new goal for this summer is to fuck so hard we lose his security deposit.
That's not a funny feeling. That's hepatitis. You got it from that bar where everything was sticky.
He did leave his bud tall boy and 2 choco tacos, so not a total loss.
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
Im wearing a bra. Made of paint.
He's like... An octopus that touches my vagina in all these diff ways at the right times. It's almost unsettling
I got arrested in a leprechaun onesie
I just said "you do you" to my penis.
skipped tacos for a blowjob. No tacos. No blowjob. More importantly...no tacos. Wtf?
Do you ever wake up and realize playing beer pong with your parents wasnt a dream? Your mom really beat you
Randomize
