The way white people respond to them, you'd think Journey was the president of Caucasia.
dude u gotta turn down the techno when u bang that chick its creepy
My booty call got married. Come over before I start tagging all the places my dick has been in her wedding photos.
It's official, I've know hooked up with everyone I carpooled with in middle school
I just walked in on my roommates playing baseball with old vegetables and a bigass knife.
Can you do me a favor and fuck someone with a car so I can get a ride home?
bad night - i tried for naughty librarian but could only manage to pull off pissed off barrista.
Hope I didn't wake u up but I woke up and there is a shirt, boxers, belt and jeans on my balcony, along with a naked guy who claimed to scale the building
Just ran into a client at a sex shop. The meeting tomorrow is going to be really awkward as we both try not to picture each other using vibrators or role play costumes.
Hey... Tell me if you remember differently, but nobody truly saw me naked, right?
Yes, yes I will fake crap in his house for you.
pssssst. you dropped everyone else off and forgot about me. im in the backseat of your car still. can you please come back outside and either let me out or take me home?
Life achievement unlocked: I just ate a Slim Jim "Lady and the Tramp" style with a guy in a bar.
I just let my boss bend me over his desk and spank me. I think that is some sort of American dream.
Just cuz you've got the biggest dick I've ever seen doesn't mean u can wake me up at 2 am
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