rolled in at 7am w/ 2 girls i met at the strip club. my neighbor was getting up to mow the lawn before he took his kids to school. i'm 31. he's younger. if given the chance, you think he'd want to switch places?
life just isnt the same w/o real world cancun
Gross thing of the day...i got cum in my new boots
Im pretty sure he just said he wants to make a baby with me, but he's pretty shitfaced, so I'm not sure if he knows who I am.
I don't appreciate the fact that you tagged me as a giant bucket Miracle Whip.
we are sitting in a kindergarden classroom alone chugging beer. look at our lives. look at our choices.
I only wish the guy being lead around by his cock at the drag show was the weirdest part of my night.
It's legal now for me to leave my boyfriend and marry you.
We were running down las vegas boulevard at 8:30 am with our beers cause we were late for our flight
How does a law student 15 days away from graduation prepare for a pass fail final? Drinking beer, eating thick cut bacon, and watching game of thrones, that's how
wearing my old cheerleader outfit to the bar was a great way to get free drinks. i should do this more often
I was sat at the table waiting with a glass of wine reading my book and the hotel staff gave me a goldfish in a bowl and said 'heres your date for the night' !
Well I passed out before 4:20 on 4/20 so I deem it a failure AND a success.
We need a hype man... Like a DMX type dude to just up the ante constantly...
You know you're drunk when you're apologizing for your asshole at 4am to the toilet. Eat shit habanero bbq sauce, you've ruined my life.
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