can you sing with all the voices of the mountain? can you paint with al the colors of the windddd
wasted?
im pocohantasssss
I wish I has some fucking Fairy God Parents, I want a kit kat so bad.
I just found all of my Mary-Kate and Ashley movies. Can you say drinking game?
We're the kind of people who ruin family vacations
hey..i found a takeout box with a half-eaten hamburger in it, the box said to text this number if found...
Valuable lesson learned: if you reach the point where you have to talk yourself in to finishing the last half of your beer, you shouldn't try.
Does it count as working out if stops are taken every half hour to smoke a blunt?
When asked if they had been introduced, Damo said "No but I know we've pretty much fucked all the same girls in town"
They had an Olympic theme party at her work yesterday. She brought home her fake gold medal and hung it on my cock after she rode me.
nyquil+orgasm=very intense and oddly interesting
Decided to smoke a bowl in my closet while my parents are gone. Just sat in the closet because I couldn't remember how to get out. Started panicking cuz I thought they were gonna show up... Checked my phone. It's been 4 minutes.
I may or may not be drunker than time right now.
can jess come too?
sure! but I don't have enough booze for the both of you.
she comes with her own booze, no worries.
You don't need yoga. You need a boyfriend! Trust me I've become all sorts of flexible this past year.
Look. All I'm saying is that if the USWNT can win a shit ton of medals and have two gay love stories with happy endings, there's still hope in this world
Randomize