operation have a gay friend backfired
My spanish teacher discovered you can watch spanish music videos on youtube. Guess what were doing in class today? Michael Scott Spanish 101
They have edible shot glasses at target.
There really is a God.
Was just grinding with my bio TA. She asked why i wasnt studying
Walking home still drunk in snow. Snowflakes are my only hydration..Need moreee
He always grinds on me and is like "This is awesome because we're both Catholic!"
Stripper with the black hair and lip rings is still asleep. Found out she wasn't lying when she said she was a squirter, it was like splash mountain.
I made her orgasm until she cried. Four years of only having sex with dudes and I've still got it.
YOU WOULD BE SEEING ME. IN MY KITCHEN. BENDING OVER MY OVEN. MAKING YOU CAKE.
Wait, that's an option?
Actually let's just focus our energy on not getting committed to a psych ward.
A bee came out of the shoe box and stung her. Even the insect community doesn't want her in those hideous things.
he's dressing as a chick for halloween. of course i'm gonna make him get his legs professionally waxed. how is this even a question?
HE WILL NEVER BE ONE OF US. HE WILL NEVER BE A DECENT, GOD-FEARING WHORE.
what is considered shitting yourself?
Like my underwear wasn't soiled, but there was definitely a departure from my asshole.
He heard our neighbor’s vibrator through the wall, knocked on her door and now they’re doing it
The blonde?!? That’s just unfair! His penis already has a fairy tale existence
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