Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Just because we had intercourse doesn't mean we're friends.
STOP SENDING ME DANCING JESUS FORWARDS.
can a guy be partially circumsized? cause i dont exactly know what i was lookng at...
Getting a high five from your dog when you're stoned is one the greatest rewards of being a pet owner.
We gotta make a movie eventually. All good, long-lasting relationships include a homemade porno
Makers Mark. Chicken nuggets in a blender. Smart
Hey! Where are you? It's Irrisponsible Patio time and you're not here firing shots down summer student's throats
He was very considerate of my needs, he offered me pizza before and after.
I would go a lot of places to get laid. But I would NOT go to Staten Island.
HOCKEY BUTTS AND BASEBALL BUTTS HONESTLY DO SOMETHING TO ME
I said, hypothetically speaking, if I was going to be having some rough sex Friday night, when WOULD be the best time for a massage, mother dear?
I just spent 100$ at a sex shop to make myself feel better. And I signed you up to win 200$ so if you win, it's mine. And yes I'm serious.
What! I said that you would fall in love? See I know better. Dark liquor makes me think everything is a dream. I barely remember saying that
Randomize
